Art from Souls

"Spirit" - Carol McCarthy
 
What makes us happy?  Probably being seen for who we are. Who are you?  Your body? Your job?  Your clothes, your house, your car?  Spirit?  Everyone is spirit.  You don't have one, you ARE one.  Aspects of God:  Beauty, generosity, patience, intelligence, warmth, humor, speaking the truth in Love.

The other side of the coin represents separation from God.
Jealousy, ignorance, violence, impatience, judgement.  The engine that drives us is Love - that aspect of God in each one of us, coming through us to each other.

Say hello.  Quietly to yourself.  Quietly to God.  Do you hear that small voice responding? 
Take time to notice, to listen.  He is showing us his compassion and understanding. For when we're asleep/unconscious to Love, God wakes us up to his Presence.  ~Carol

 "Clarity" - Colleen Penquite

My most compassionate self, with all of my not-so-compassionate judgements, chooses today to keep all of my opinions to my self, to keep my mouth shut. I ask God to help me, just for today. I have struggled all week. What do I want,  what is making ME crazy! In a moment of clarity (by Gods Grace), I see.
I make me crazy. When I sit in me, that's all I see. When I can look to You, and ask You what I can do, how can I help YOU, then and only then do I move from all of my self- ish - ness! Whew! A tip. A blog to write, really helps. Peace!

 "One Today"- Richard Blanco
 
One sun rose on us today, kindled over our shores, peeking over the Smokies, greeting the faces of the Great Lakes, spreading a simple truth across the Great Plains, then charging across the Rockies. One light, waking up rooftops, under each one, a story told by our silent gestures moving behind windows.
My face, your face, millions of faces in morning's mirrors, each one yawning to life, crescendoing into our day: pencil-yellow school buses, the rhythm of traffic lights, fruit stands: apples, limes, and oranges arrayed like rainbows
begging our praise. Silver trucks heavy with oil or paper—
bricks or milk, teeming over highways alongside us,
on our way to clean tables, read ledgers, or save lives—
to teach geometry, or ring-up groceries as my mother did
for twenty years, so I could write this poem.
All of us as vital as the one light we move through,
the same light on blackboards with lessons for the day:
equations to solve, history to question, or atoms imagined,
the "I have a dream" we keep dreaming,
or the impossible vocabulary of sorrow that won't explain
the empty desks of twenty children marked absent
today, and forever. Many prayers, but one light
breathing color into stained glass windows,
life into the faces of bronze statues, warmth
onto the steps of our museums and park benches
as mothers watch children slide into the day.

One ground. Our ground, rooting us to every stalk
of corn, every head of wheat sown by sweat
and hands, hands gleaning coal or planting windmills
in deserts and hilltops that keep us warm, hands
digging trenches, routing pipes and cables, hands
as worn as my father's cutting sugarcane
so my brother and I could have books and shoes.
The dust of farms and deserts, cities and plains
mingled by one wind—our breath. Breathe. Hear it
through the day's gorgeous din of honking cabs,
buses launching down avenues, the symphony
of footsteps, guitars, and screeching subways,
the unexpected song bird on your clothes line.
Hear: squeaky playground swings, trains whistling,
or whispers across café tables, Hear: the doors we open
for each other all day, saying: hello, shalom,
buon giorno, howdy, namaste, or buenos días
in the language my mother taught me—in every language
spoken into one wind carrying our lives
without prejudice, as these words break from my lips.
One sky: since the Appalachians and Sierras claimed
their majesty, and the Mississippi and Colorado worked
their way to the sea. Thank the work of our hands:
weaving steel into bridges, finishing one more report
for the boss on time, stitching another wound
or uniform, the first brush stroke on a portrait,
or the last floor on the Freedom Tower
jutting into a sky that yields to our resilience.
One sky, toward which we sometimes lift our eyes
tired from work: some days guessing at the weather
of our lives, some days giving thanks for a love
that loves you back, sometimes praising a mother
who knew how to give, or forgiving a father
who couldn't give what you wanted.
We head home: through the gloss of rain or weight
of snow, or the plum blush of dusk, but always—home,
always under one sky, our sky. And always one moon
like a silent drum tapping on every rooftop
and every window, of one country—all of us—
facing the stars
hope—a new constellation
waiting for us to map it,
waiting for us to name it—together.

  [Note: This poem by Richard Blanco touched me so deeply, as spoken at the Presidential Inauguration. It brings the largest version of community together! What a gift, this poem.]

Movements

Yes, yes, I know. Some of us (I'm certainly one) are attracted to the Facebook wisdom - meme-ish, nicely framed quotable quotes. How I love them. The soul purpose of these wisdom bytes is to resonate with the reader.

I hold an endless stream of wonders, hampster -wheeling in my mind most of the time. The really potent ones touch me. Those take me to meditation or prayer, often in the form of journaling. This leads me to plan: how can this moment of clarity, this fragile human understanding, translate into action. If this epiphany large or small remains static, it defeats the gift of awareness. Being (as noted in the prompt above) should motivate Doing.

Henri Nouwen describes spiritual formation this way:

"... it is not about steps or stages on the way to perfection. It's about the movements from the mind to the heart through prayer in its many forms that reunite us with God, each other and our truest selves."

Movements. Yes. Like rivers and wind, like the build-blocks of a symphony, like the way our blood courses through our bodies, keeping us alive. So does a spiritual truth, mind to heart to action: the shaping of a plan for engaging this truth with a community.

This is the Action of Being!

Triptych

Sacramental Dinner (Carol McCarthy)

Last night I had dinner with friends.  It was more like communion followed by the cool, healing waters of baptism by laughter.  These two women carried me with compassion during a time when I could barely think.  They let me "be" during that time, asking nothing in return.  I learned compassion from them by their awesome quiet example.

Giving and taking are tricky business.  There are times in our lives when we are givers and times when circumstances require us to be takers.  No one wants to be a taker.  What makes it all work in balance is receiving. Receiving God's love and receiving God's love through others.  I'm so lucky to know these beautiful souls and to share a carefree evening with them.

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                                                       Ouch (Colleen Penquite)

Can I demonstrate compassion if I don't get my way? 
Wow, I've had a nudge - could that really be true?
In order for me to show you compassion, I need to be ok first? Ouch. 
So, if I'm comfortable, I can help You?! Otherwise, tough luck?
I just outed myself. Now... I need to do some work. 
That's how I will show compassion today. 
In my program of recovery, I am taught.  If I'm not the problem, there is no solution. 
I desire to be in the light and the love: to be the solution, the compassion. Peace Out. Colleen.

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The Ride (Jean Berry)

The process of letting go of something that you really care about is never easy. I started just such a process last evening. 
A variety of emotions keep the ride interesting. Holding on seems safest; but with this kind of ride, the comfort comes in peeling your fingers off the bar slowly, one at a time, letting the wind whip threw your hair a few more times until the coaster comes to a complete stop. And then you marvel at what a good time you've had, how the people in the cars around you laughed and shared the fun, how new wisdom was born between the push off and the landing, how life has changed for the better. The ache heals, the energy shifts. 
No anger; just gratitude. On to the next ride!
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Note: Welcome to The Compassionary, Carol McCarthy. Your healing wisdom brings new life to all those you touch, with hands, oil, prayers or words. Love you!
 

Managing Self

Fearn Lickfield is co-creator of the Green Mountain School of Druidry with her husband Ivan McBeth.  She is a certified flower essence practitioner, Geomancer, Ecstatic Dance leader, avid gardener, and Priestess of Gaia.   As facilitator, teacher and grounded spiritual counselor she guides the healing and connection of people with the Earth.


Conflict Management

Whether or not you are working actively in a spiritual community, it is extremely useful in life to have some good tools for conflict. Conflict is inevitable and without good tools and awareness, it can be scary, messy and really uncomfortable. Practicing conscious conflict management makes deep learning and healing experiences possible for all involved. Rather than a problem, it becomes a blessing in disguise.

The Charge
We know we are in a state of conflict when we are “charged.” The symptoms include a state of mental agitation, (ie. we keep internally replaying an incident, thinking of what we wish we had said, or having violent thoughts) and the activation of our pain body. The associated feelings in the pain body range from anger to sadness to confusion. We cannot be present for anything else. We are totally distracted.

The Choice
The purpose of conflict management is to learn about and heal ourselves and to stay connected and in good relationship with others. The first question to ask yourself when you feel charged about a person or situation (X) is, “Do I want to maintain a healthy working relationship with X?” X could also be yourself if the conflict is within. If you decide that the relationship is not worth repairing it is time to do your own process to let it go. (you cant get rid of yourself so hopefully the answer is YES!) If the answer is yes, try the process outlined below. I have found these steps to be the most useful in my experience with several different models for conflict management.

Clear with Self First; write it down!
If possible give yourself time to process alone. We often regret our immediate response to conflict when acting out from a place of fear or anger. Excuse yourself gracefully, saying you need some time to think. Find a place where you have some privacy and take a moment to breathe and become aware of your emotions and the sensations in your body. Ground and release to the earth. Give yourself compassion. Then pull out your journal or something to write on. You may want to vent a bit before confining yourself to this formula. Venting alone, in confidentiality with a trusted friend, or in writing can be very helpful in unloading the charge before taking next steps.

Observations:
What did you observe/see, hear, smell, etc. Facts only here! The rest is your story and interpretation. What would a video camera have picked up?
Learn to discern between judgment and fact.
For example, the following statement is full of inference and assumption;
“When you came at me with that nasty look on your face accusing me of stealing…..”
This statement is facts only.
When you walked into the room with your eyes wide open and pointing your finger at me, and said, “You took my sandwich!”
See the difference?

Feelings
See the feelings list in your NVC book for a full range of options. It is good practice to expand our emotional vocabulary. Our feelings have so many nuances; give them an appropriate word, or a few! Keep in mind these are your feelings. Avoid victim words which often end in –ed, such as belittled, harassed, misunderstood, disrespected, rejected, etc. These imply someone did it to you. Nobody made you feel this. Take responsibility for it. Go deeper, how do you feel?
I feel shame and confusion.

Interpretation; The story I tell myself is I….
We don’t get charged unless we have a trigger, or button to push. In other words, if you spot it, you got it. This is the concept of projection. Those things that really upset us in others are the things in ourselves that we don’t like to admit. This is the concept of Shadow. You may want to make a list of the judgments you hold about the person with whom you are in conflict. Read them over and see which ones stick when you turn it into an “I” Statement. Alternately, you may look at how their actions bring up an old message you hold to be true about yourself.
 The story I tell myself is I am untrustworthy.

Request/Commitment
This can be as simple as speaking your truth and being heard by the person you are in conflict with, or asking for a change in behavior. It is important that you do not ask someone to change who they are. They may be able to go about something differently that feels more harmonious, but it needs to be consensual. When making a request of another, make it a specific, positive, action to which they can agree. And keep in mind the difference between a request and a demand. With a request you must be willing to hear No for an answer and be prepared to get your needs met on your own. A demand requires a Yes for an answer. This takes the power away from the other person. The real change needs to rest with each of us. How can we respond differently knowing we have triggers? How can we heal our wounds so that we are not thrown off by the insensitivities and emotions of others? What request can you make of yourself?
My request is that you ask me for the whole story before you question my honesty and integrity. and/or…
I commit to work through the belief that I am untrustworthy so I can stand strong in my integrity even when I am questioned.

Empowerment; The Affirmation
(this part may be saved for later when you have more time to delve deeper)
Is this true? Take a moment to look deeply into your soul. Where did you pick up that belief in the first place? How old is it? What do you need to transform that belief into one that is more life affirming? What belief or affirmation would you like to replace that limiting belief?
I trust myself.
Say it several times. Write it on your mirror and look into your own eyes as you say it often! Really take it in and soak it up. This may take time, so remember your commitment to continue the transformation until it is complete.

A Radical Act: Honoring the mirror
Can you find it in your heart to authentically thank the person who stirred up this healing process for you thru conflict? Can you see them as a teacher and divine challenger pushing you to heal and grow and become empowered? Thank you for bringing this limiting belief to my attention so I can transform it into one that makes me more whole!

Clearing with Other
After writing it all down you may realize it is all about you have no need to speak to X about it. If there is something that you need to communicate to X you can do so as outlined below. Do not share the venting or list of judgments!
Permission: I would like to clear with you around what came up re. the sandwich. Are you available? If yes, continue. If no, ask when they will be, and respect their boundaries.
Observation: When you walked into the room with your eyes wide open and said, “You took my sandwich!”
Feeling: I felt shame and confusion.
Interpretation: The story I told myself is I am untrustworthy. You may choose to share more about this belief if you want more intimacy and understanding.
Request: My request is that you check things out with me before jumping to conclusions about my actions. The truth is that I put it in the fridge so it wouldn’t go bad.
Honoring: Thank you for bringing this limiting belief to my attention so I can transform it into one that makes me more whole! (I trust myself.)
(words in bold do not need to be spoken. They are there to help you see the steps of this formula)
At this point, be open to hearing what was coming up for the other person in order to better understand their needs and feelings. However, if the listener becomes charged by hearing your clearing it is NOT appropriate for them to respond immediately. They will need to take space and journal, etc.

This may feel a bit complex, artificial or formulaic in the beginning, but with practice it comes more naturally. Put it into your own words and share only what feels helpful.
Remember, the most important part of conflict management is to take responsibility for our feelings, judgments, and triggers. The people with whom we are charged are merely holding up a mirror for us to see our wounds. It is their responsibility to work with theirs and ours to work with ours. We can only change what is inside us. Doing this work is well worth it! The more whole we become, the less affected we are by outside circumstances. Our world changes to reflect this high energy state and conflict melts away. Healthy conflict management and the healing of our wounds creates deep inner peace and by extension, world peace.

Reflection point:

Fearn is my cousin! I'm so pleased to have her contributions on this blog. We don't see each other very often, but we certainly share a kindred spiritual understanding! Love you, Fearn! Thank you for participating!

Share the Love

Compassionate Colleen

On our way home from DC. We stopped at St. Patrick's, a little church in West Virginia. It was Maundy Thursday. The Priest says to the congregation before the service began, "we need two things to thrive in life."  I think food & water. He says, "to be loved, and to love."

I was actually blown away. He walked away from the pulpit. We sat with this for about 5mins , then the service began. It was SO not like a typical catholic service. The mass went on. He washed our feet. As he was doing so, I bent down and whispered in his ear, "I Love You." I had to repeat it.

I'm 52, raised Catholic - I've never told a priest I loved him, or even thought about it. He was loving me by washing my feet, as Jesus did. I had to tell him what my little voice was screaming.

In order for me to feel love, I need to give love. That Holy Thursday, I felt so much Love & Compassion. For Jesus, for this Priest...my Easter was made more passionate for this awesome experience.

Share the Love,
Colleen

Nurture - (part 1)

Oh Great Mystery
We give thanks for the natural world we see:
All the creatures, stones and plants
Who show us how to be.
We learn their lessons, seek their truths,
Return our loving praise,
We honor the peace they show us,
Which guides our human ways.
We ask that we may become like them,
Living in harmony,
And deep within our heart of hearts,
Know the Sacred Mystery.

~Jamie Sams

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Nurture is a language found in every culture. Nurture has formed the human family. It is timeless and adaptable. It comes from the heart and will, combined. We care for, we honor, we feed, we nourish.
Nurture is what we give our precious energy to, where we focus our ample attention, how we make our hearts know. What could be more essential!

Today we begin a simple project with a collection of of people, all ages, from Dayton, OH. This is part of an education and outreach project for Cityfolk. (This is one of the places I put my energies (smile).) For the past few months, we have held meetings, made phone calls, sent emails, planned and discussed, struggled with calendars and budgets and stuff... all in an effort to bring a diverse collection of people together around this common theme. I'll tell you right now: all worth it!!!
The goal, simply put: nurturing the human family.

Dayton is a remarkable community for its size, highly diverse, robust with culture and ideas. This project is a gathering of some, only scratching the surface, but a symbol for ALL of us. Cityfolk has invited two public schools, one with whole-school content investment (Cleveland), one with a committed after-school sports program (Kiser), Dayton's Jewish day school (Hillel Academy), students from local Catholic Schools (Holy Angels, Alter and C.J), University of Dayton visual artists (sculpture, print making and photography), an anthropologist (Mayan studies) and naturalists (the Rivers Institute); several cultural organizations: Burundian Cultural Education Association, Miami Valley Council for Native Americans, Chinese representatives including a local Chinese teacher, inspiring local African American artist, Willis 'Bing' Davis, Orgullo Mexicano, our local Mexican dance ensemble and all the networks therein. All Cityfolk projects are in partnership with the City of Dayton's Welcome Dayton initiative, living into our immigrant friendly mission. All of us together: we are nurturing the community!!

The core of the Nurture Project will be felt today as many gather at SunWatch, a beautiful, honoring space- a prehistoric Indian village - that embodies much about our theme. Today, school children and their families, teachers, administrators, artists and nature lovers will come together to play and pray, all in one action. During the afternoon, one of our Nurture Project leaders will lead an opening ceremony to engage the community-of-the-moment and those who will join, in a sacred connection. We will be nurtured to nurture.

Guy Jones is the executive director of the Miami Valley Council for Native Americans and a friend. He shares his wisdom with this community on a regular basis. He speaks of a life ethic, a history, a connectedness, that proves to be as essential as the theme itself,  an appropriate leader to bless us forward today.

I'll be blogging throughout the project, particularly as we begin and culminate, offering this small community effort as an example of compassion in action! It is about the Action!

More soon,

Jean